Reflecting on this question—what did you have in 2015 but not in 2025?—can be an incredibly eye-opening way to take stock of your personal growth, whether you’re overcoming a divorce, battling an eating disorder, or simply navigating life’s inevitable ups and downs. I came across this question on a subreddit. For me, this question led me to revisit a period of my life where everything looked stable on the surface, but underneath, I was struggling in ways that I didn’t even realize fully at the time.
In 2015, I had what many would consider a “successful” life: I was married, living in the U.S., I was in my 20’s, running my own business, traveling around the world, and seemed to have all the pieces of the puzzle. But the reality? I was in a loveless marriage, and my partner and I were moving in completely different directions in life, wanting different things from life. Worse, I was grappling with a lifelong eating disorder, stuck in a constant cycle of self-doubt and control that never let me truly be at peace. The food noise and guilt that consumed my every waking moment made it difficult to show up for myself and my partner fully. My body, mind, and heart were in turmoil, even though, on the outside, I had all the “right” things.
Now, as we will soon enter 2025 in a few months, my life looks entirely different. Since 2018, I’ve been happily single and living in Spain, having left the U.S. to rebuild my life completely. I’ve not only overcome my eating disorder but have also developed a deep appreciation and respect for myself that I never thought was possible back in 2015. The food noise that once consumed me is no longer. For once in my life, I can fully and truly enjoy a meal without the need to bing or purge, count the calories, and actually have my brain single full. This is the strangest feeling ever, but one that I am beyond grateful for. This is what it means to eat and feel normal.
How I Got Here: The Steps That Helped Me Heal
The journey from 2015 to 2025 wasn’t easy, but it was transformative. Here are some of the things that helped me along the way:
1. Embracing Therapy and Professional Help
I began working with a therapist who specialized in eating disorders and trauma recovery. Therapy gave me the tools to dig into the deeper issues fueling my disorder, and it also helped me navigate the painful emotions of divorce. If you’re struggling with either of these challenges, I can’t recommend seeking professional help enough. It was a turning point for me, allowing me to confront my fears, break unhealthy patterns, and ultimately heal.
Resources:
- The National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) offers a range of resources, from support groups to professional help: www.nationaleatingdisorders.org
- Psychology Today is a great resource for finding a therapist near you: www.psychologytoday.com
- Beating Eating Disorders offers plenty of resources and guidance, especially if you are in the UK: www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/
2. Rediscovering My Body Through Movement
Exercise became a way for me to reconnect with my body in a healthy, non-punishing way. Strength Training and Pilates, in particular, were instrumental. These practices helped me appreciate my body for what it could do, rather than how it looked. It shifted my mindset from one of control and shame to one of gratitude and strength. Most recently, joining a running club has also helped me to connect with like-minded individuals, and seeing that runners come in all different shapes and sizes has helped me in a way to appreciate my body for what it is and what it is capable of.
Resources:
- ALO Moves offers a wide range of Pilates classes online, from beginner to advanced, making it easy to fit into any routine: www.alomoves.com
- Pvolve focuses on low-impact, functional strength training, which helps you build muscle while being gentle on your body: www.pvolve.com
- Strava is a popular running app that allows you to track your runs, join running clubs, and connect with a community of runners worldwide: www.strava.com
- Yoga with Adriene offers free YouTube yoga classes that range from beginner to advanced. It’s a gentle way to get started: www.youtube.com/user/yogawithadriene
- Body Positive Yoga focuses on making yoga accessible and body-positive: www.bodypositiveyoga.com
3. Establishing Healthy Boundaries
Part of my journey was realizing that I needed to set boundaries—not just with others, but also with myself. I had to learn to say no to things that no longer served me, including toxic relationships, situations that triggered my disordered eating, and self-sabotaging thoughts. This took time and effort, but it’s been a critical part of reclaiming my life.
A resource that was incredibly helpful in this process was Choose You by Helen Marie, a renowned psychologist in the UK. This workbook-style book provides practical exercises to help you identify and set healthy boundaries, offering tools to manage your emotional well-being and reclaim your personal power.
Resource:
- Choose You by Helen Marie: A hands-on workbook to help you develop healthier boundaries and prioritize yourself in everyday life. You can find Choose You by Helen Marie on Amazon.com.
4. Building a Support System
Navigating divorce and overcoming an eating disorder are not things you can do alone. Surrounding myself with a supportive network of friends, family, and like-minded individuals made a world of difference. Whether through therapy groups or online communities, connecting with others who understood what I was going through gave me the courage to keep going.
Resources:
- Divorce Care offers local and virtual support groups for people going through separation or divorce: www.divorcecare.org
- Eating Disorder Hope provides an online community and resources: www.eatingdisorderhope.com
5. Embracing Change and Moving to Spain
In 2021, I made the bold decision to move to Spain—a complete shift that allowed me to reinvent myself and leave behind the environment that was keeping me stuck. It’s not that you have to move halfway across the world to heal, but sometimes a big change is exactly what you need to start fresh. This move forced me to step outside my comfort zone and truly own my independence. It’s allowed me to build my social circle with like-minded individuals who live healthier lifestyles and are supportive and non-judgemental.
Looking Forward: What I Hope for Myself in the Future
Looking back at who I was in 2015, it’s hard to believe how far I’ve come. I no longer carry the weight of a broken marriage or an eating disorder. These two life-impacting events no longer define me but add to my narrative that is part of me and how I got here. In 2025, I want to approach the year that I have a sense of freedom, self-love, and fulfillment that I could have never imagined. But I’m not stopping here.
For the future, I hope to continue growing, traveling, and building a life that feels authentic to me. I want to deepen my relationship with myself, continue helping others through my wellness work, and stay open to whatever life brings. Most of all, I hope to inspire others who feel stuck in their current situation—whether it’s a marriage that isn’t working, a battle with food, or simply feeling lost in life—that change is always possible.
What About You? Reflecting on Your Journey
So, what did you have in 2015 but not in 2025? Take a moment to reflect on this question for yourself. Whether you’re in the middle of a major life change or feeling stuck in old habits, remember that growth is always within reach. The life you want is waiting for you—you just have to be willing to take the first step.
If you’re struggling with something similar, know that you’re not alone, and there are resources and support systems to help you along the way. Your future self will thank you for the work you do today.
